The Maddening
by corneroffandom
Summary: A series of Alice/Hatter fics, varying lengths and genres.
1. Protection

She can still feel Hatter lingering behind her as her gaze drifts from the powerless, limp looking former queen to her regal, stiff looking son. Jack Heart... She's not sure if he's king now, but his arms are around the Duchess and she feels-- not jealous, neccessarily, but a little pained... a lot raw. When they finally break apart, she keeps her chin up as she walks over to him and drops the ring silently into Jack's hands, officially done with the mission. Right now, she just wants to sleep for a decade, forget everything that happened the last few days.

"You alright?" Hatter's low voice drags her thoughts from the two blondes and she gazes at him, shrugging distantly.

Her dad's dead, for real this time, after ten years of her thinking she had done something to make him leave-- after just realizing that no, no, he didn't want to leave-- he had been kidnapped, brainwashed, drained of everything that had made him her dad until mere minutes before his murder. She's far from alright but there's something weird about Hatter that distracts her from the tears stinging at her eyes-- he's pale, even trembling a little. It reminds her briefly of how he looked after he was nearly shot, just different, somehow. She considers all the torture he's gone through the last few days-- and what she might not be aware of. "Are _you_?" she asks, tentatively reaching out towards him.

His lips part like he's about to say something flippant but before any words come out, he cringes and changes his mind, eyes on her outreached hand. "Uh, yeah."

She feels annoyed, sick of swallowing lies. "Hatter. Don't expect me to trust you and then lie to me. Not now, after everything." His wandering eyes snap back to her face and yeah, he definitely looks sick, his stubble looking black against his pasty skin. "What's wrong with you?"

"Just-- just the bruises and cuts," he says feebily, the lie obvious as soon as she looks into his eyes.

She shakes her head, the last few days finally crashing down upon her in all their terrible glory. "Fine, don't tell me," she says, her lips turning down as she brushes past him, looking for a way through the crowd of people from earth. As soon as her body grazes his, he hisses and she stops immediately, feeling the heated tremors through his shirt and jacket. "Hatter, God, just _tell _me," she whispers, moving away. She may be mad at him but she doesn't want to cause him physical pain, especially with his face looking as cut up as it is, blood still flaking along his throat. Speaking of... She gazes up at him, certain she now knows the answer, and she seems to forget about all of the people around them as she carefully tugs at the jacket, peeling it off of his shoulders without asking. He seems to understand what the dawning look of horrified understanding on her face means.

He doesn't even try to stop her, looks away as if ashamed and she carefully unbuttons his shirt, somewhat surprised to find the body armor that had simultaneously relieved and pissed her off mere days before is missing, all thoughts about how _sensual _this would be in any other circumstance wiping clean from her mind as soon as his chest and abdomen is revealed. It's much, much worse than bruises, she discovers in horror, as there are burn marks and bruises of various sizes and shapes spread up and down his rib cage on either side... "Oh, God," she mutters, shaking her head. "What did they do to you?"

_She looks up at him in amazement. "Oh, my God."_

"Oh these, they're just a few bruises and cuts," he's saying, looking flustered as she ignores his claims and jumps into his arms, eyes wide as she grips at him. She had thought he was dead-- thought her suicidal mission had also taken his life but he's here, he's a little beaten up, but he's strong and solid around her and murmuring something about how nice it feels-- which she agrees with-- before reluctantly pulling away, suggesting they get to safety before continuing this.

He says something vague about Drs. Dee and Dum liking their torture devices before she shakes her head, a distressed look on her face. "What?"

"Did I hurt you?" she mutters, hand fluttering by her lips. "When I hugged you before...?"

"Course not!" he says, anxious to ease her fears. "I..."

"What if you have nerve damage and I did hurt you but you couldn't feel it? I mean, oh God, this could be bad," she says, taking in his tired features once more. "Really, really bad..."

He frowns and catches her still fluttering hands as they hover helplessly above his chest, just wanting to ease the look of horror on her face. "Listen, I'll get checked out, alright? I will, I promise. I'll be fine." She nods with an uncertain look on her face as he presses at her hands, molding her fingers around his subconsciously. "But really, Alice... how are you?" He's hurt and tired but he still takes the time to ask about her...

That is all it takes as the last of her strength crumbles, and she buries her face into the sleeves of the purple jacket that he gave her what feels like ages ago now, not wanting to risk hurting him further by doing the cliche'd thing and crying against his shirt. He ignores this however, quickly rebuttoning the shirt around his beaten up midsection and dragging her over so her face is pressed against the fabric which, despite it all, is still somehow soft and comforting. They stand like that forever as he just lets her cry it all out, shielding her from the nosy eyes of the still lingering oysters and suits.


	2. Mysteries

_"How long was I there?"_

"An hour," her mom's voice reverbrates in her mind, mocking her.

Like the original Alice, there was a distinct possibility everything she thought she experienced was a dream... she had nothing, after all, to remember Wonderland by, not that she'd really want to, but... well... the Stone of Wonderland she had left there, the jacket Hatter had given her she had returned to him, her father had died there...

Her fists bunch in the sheets of the hospital bed as she swipes angrily at the tears pooling in her eyes. All she had left was a headful of memories and a morose feeling of loneliness whenever she spots someone walking by her room with a hat on, especially when she looks past the hat and sees anything other than a wide grin that seems to be generally used to cover some other emotion up and unruly dark brown hair fanning around the rim.

She doesn't understand how, after years of always telling her boyfriends that things were moving too fast-- oh, yes, Jack definitely wasn't the first--, Hatter could've wormed under her skin so quickly but he definitely had, just to... just to... well. There's the crux. He hadn't really left her, she had left him... only it had seemed he was trying to do the right thing-- get her back to her world, where she'd be safer and where she had family and friends, a life.

She closes her eyes and sighs, dropping her head back against her pillow. She doesn't miss Wonderland but she does miss Hatter, his inane chatter when things are peaceful and the soft twinkle in his eye when he looks at her.

_A night is how long it takes to collect all of the oysters and prepare the Looking Glass, to crown Jack Heart as the new king and, even figure out what's to happen to the former queen._

Winston Heart is declared dead following the collapse but his words and actions leave a lasting impression-- the queen had always been too addled from her obsessions with the teas and the artificial feelings to really be a worthwhile leader, Winston had truly been the brains behind everything. This fact takes little time to come out as the former queen is screaming about her people looking at her and taking orders from that nasty tart of an oyster as she's led out of the clearing, to the scarab where Jack had determined she'd be held.

Ten of Clubs looks distinctly uncomfortable but finally explains when asked by the soon-to-be crowned king exactly that-- they listened to the queen to some extent but if Winston suggested they do something else, they tended to do that instead. It was a juggling act of epic porportions but the queen was so far gone, she never noticed even when it came to monumental decisions.

Which is why Alice thinks it's some kind of irony that exile, initially put into the queen's mind by Winston in the first place, is what Jack decides for his mother, finding a far out of the way place in Wonderland where only a few people live and tea never found a good hold on its residents. It seems the perfect place for her to detox and live out the rest of her life.

Once everything is done, Alice is relieved to find Charlie is well despite his insane way of helping to overthrow the queen, lurking outside in the shadows as night falls, singing "Hey noni noni" as he tends to do. She wonders if Hatter is nearby and hopes that he is, since she's not seen him since just after the ring was forced from the queen. She'll be leaving as soon as they finish collecting the oysters and it's a strange thought-- after all this time to be going home...

She watches Charlie with a fond smile for a minute before turning to continue looking for Hatter, growing more and more despondent as she goes further into the crowds of people lurking around outside the room containing the Looking Glass without seeing him. She knows she should sleep while she can but if this is the last chance she has at talking to Hatter, she doesn't want to waste it.

He had helped her so much, she thinks she just wants to thank him... yeah, totally, that's the only reason... she forces a smile as she sees the police officer who tried to defend her from the queen earlier. "Excuse me, do you remember that man with the hat that was with me earlier?"

"I ... hm, can barely remember my name but yeah, I do remember him. I saw him over there a little bit ago," the man says, waving his hand over to a couple of trees off in the distance. 

_If she squints, she thinks she can see a form laying beneath them in the twilight so she thanks him before walking over there. _Don't walk too quickly, Alice, _she tells herself. _No point in seeming desperate... _As she reaches him and looks down at his hat-covered face, she wonders when how she acted around him began to matter so much. _He might be asleep,_ she ponders to herself and turns reluctantly to leave. _

_She's not even taken a step when there's a shifting sound at her feet and he says, "'Ey," in a sleepy kind of manner._

She smiles despite herself and kneels down by him, watching as he pulls the hat off of his face and settles it on his chest, his eyes gleaming in the soft glow from the setting sun. "Did I wake you?"

"Nah, was just havin' a minute of quiet," he says, shrugging off her apologetic glance and sitting up against the tree trunks. "Lotsa oysters-- uh, people, over there," he says, glancing back at the hall entrance.

She nods and pokes at the ground, trying to wonder how to word her thank you... after everything, all the close calls, his nonstop attempts at helping her, no word in her vocalbulary seems to be efficient, every sentence she forms in her mind appearing to be lacking in one way or another.

"Ya alright?" he asks, leaning forward with a worried pinch to his face. "Just because I said I wanted silence earlier doesn't mean you can't talk, Alice."

He looks so earnest and worried that she can't help the smile that spreads across her face as she thinks about how she's going to miss this-- this easy connection that she never really had, even with Jack. "I'm fine," she confirms. "Just... thinking. I'm, uh, probably going to be going home tomorrow."

He nods, the old emotions fading away to be replaced with vulnerability and a little sadness. She takes in the subtle changes in his demeanor and finds she approves-- at least she's the only one not thrown a little off kilter with the thoughts of her leaving so quickly.

What scares her is if he asked her to stay, she might be tempted to say yes... but that doesn't exactly seem Hatter's style.

"What from your world do you miss the most, outside of your mother?" he asks curiously, trying to distract from the emotions swirling in his eyes as he grins at her, all teeth and gleam and falseness.

She thinks about it and smiles, "No offense to Charlie but I really miss our food."

"What's your favorite meal then?" he wonders, seeming to be content to keep the conversation light as time ticks past, too quickly.

She smiles, remembering the look in his eyes as she explained pizza to him. She looks around at the empty room before her-- her mom getting some food from the cafeteria now that Alice is awake and more steady emotionally-- and sighs, shaking her head. "It can't be a dream," she decides, a calm kind of certainty suffusing through her like it's always been there, just waiting for her to vocalize it.

She's thumbing through the old Alice in Wonderland book that was her father's when she's called to meet the construction worker who found her and one look at him takes away her lingering loneliness, cements her conviction that it wasn't a dream-- there's no hat, no unruly hair tempting her to play with it, but there is the familiar face and wide eyes with a hint of uncertainty in their depths. The last few pieces of the puzzle fall into place as she dashes to him, clinging to him desperately-- if it's been two, empty days for her, she doesn't want to think about how long he's missed her if time between the worlds are so off that an hour here is days there (And yeah, that's a little cocky of her but he wouldn't be _here _if he's not missed her, right?). Her thoughts are derailed as he kisses her hungrily and murmurs the very words she had been thinking.

Finally, everything just fits.


	3. Reminders

After a shaky story about how they met to try to get that shocked look off of Carol Hamilton's face, Carol shakes her head in confusion and excuses herself to get some tea, which Hatter thinks is just her way of getting some distance from this odd situation to think for a moment.

Alice smiles awkwardly at him, curling her fingers around his as she leads him to the couch. It's weird, he being here after she spent two days almost certain Wonderland was a dream like it was in the book, since her mom claimed only an hour passed, but she's so glad he followed her. "What made you change your mind?" she asks softly, almost afraid to ask-- as if his saying he missed her just moments earlier wasn't answer enough, she just needs to hear it all from his lips.

"I didn't... like how things were back at the Looking Glass," he says with a disturbed look in his eyes that she just wants to smooth away, but refrains, waiting to hear him out. "I, It was weird," he stammers and she finds it cute in a painful way as he runs his fingers over her palm almost subconsciously. "I saw you with Jack and it was like everything we'd been through didn't matter," he admits slowly, as if struggling with the honesty. "Thought maybe it was all in my head or somethin'."

She thinks she understands, especially considering how Jack had treated Hatter when he came to take her to meet Caterpillar-- like he was second rate, even though it was Hatter who had kept her safe the whole time she was in Wonderland, had risked everything to get her back home. She gently pulls her hands from his and he looks wounded a moment, as if thinking he's said something wrong-- or perhaps, too right, as fear takes over the pain in his eyes and she curses herself for her hasty movement. She tries to ease his uncertainty by leaning over and smiling at him. "While we wait for my mom to stop freaking out in the kitchen, do you want to see the rest of the apartment?" In hindsight she thinks it's an odd question to come out with right now, but he accepts immediately, obviously curious by this world.

It's not a huge apartment, just the living room, dining room/kitchen, her mom's room, the bathroom and hers... which, with her mother holed up in the dining room, doesn't leave much to show him, she realizes a second later as she shakes her head, taking him down the hallway. Her own lack of foresight is amazing to even her. "We don't have a lot of room but for the two of us, it's nice enough," she says to him as they walk towards her room and she swallows. _No guy's ever made it as far as my room before,_ she thinks almost uncomfortably, feeling exposed for no real reason. Hatter wouldn't really care about her bedroom after everything they've been through, but it's still a strange thought. _Leave it to Hatter to be the first,_ she thinks with a smile, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye.

He stops in the doorway, gazing around her room with a fascinated look on his face at the earthly furniture. Things are similar but Wonderland has put a twist on everything, its staples being loud and bright, large and flambouyant. Here, oysters-- people, he reminds himself sternly-- seem to prefer more muted colors, durability against flashiness. "Amazing," he breathes, stepping into the room at her encouragement. The room is simple and small but seems to him like it's _vibrating _with Alice, her smell, her favorite things, just everything. He thinks he could stay here forever and be perfectly happy, as long as she's watching him with a smile like she is now. He thinks about the tea shop and wonders if his office-- now destroyed, the grass that he cared so intensely for brown and dead, the chair torn apart and the clothes so carefully stored mere strips of torn fabric now-- echoed his essence the way this room does for Alice. It's a sobering thought, in light of everything.

"You like it?" she asks with a smile as she curls up on her bed, seemingly content to watch as he wanders around her room, examining various things she has laying around-- books, papers, the laptop-- which really interests him for a moment, before he carries on.

"Yeah," he says thoughtfully, examining a CD with so much intensity, one would think it carried all the answers to the universe.

She's about to ask what kind of music they have in Wonderland when his shoulders tighten and he jerks away from something. When he shifts, she realizes it's the lava lamp that's attracted his attention with its blue glow as the lumps of lava rise and fall inside of it. "What's wrong?" she asks, standing up to join him as his agitation grows.

He mumbles something quickly that she doesn't catch fully, only grasping onto "torture room" before he's picking the lava lamp up and moving as if he's about to smash it, seemingly unaffected by the heated glass that she's burnt her finger on a time or two in the past.

"Hatter!" she gasps, catching his arm. "Stop it!" Whether it's her touch or voice, she's not sure but he comes back from where he's been, gaping at her.

"Alice... Why do you own this?" he breathes raspily, an anxious look in his eye.

She shakes her head in confusion at his sudden mood change. "It was my parents', they're a common decorative lamp from around the 1980s. What's wrong, Hatter?" His eyes are drifting back to the lamp still clutched tightly in his hand and she nearly hums with frustration but takes a deep breath, wrapping her fingers around his jaw and forcing his gaze back at her. "What _is _it?"

He releases a shuddering breath and attempts to explain, his eyes boring into hers with the intensity of the memory he's about to relive, "When the suits took us all-- they put me in a room with those twin ... things... who had you when Charlie and I found you. They called it the torture room. It resembled this _lamp_, except the lava was green," he says, shaking the lava lamp almost angrily, causing the lava to break apart and appear to tint the whole water blue.

She recalls the bruises-- cuts-- _burns _-- and swallows painfully. "Oh, Hatter," she breathes, gently easing the lamp from his suddenly limp grip and putting it on the bed as far from his line of sight as is possible. His face is now healed but she knows the scars from the burns must still be scattered across his rib cage, tears welling up in her eyes at the thought. "I'm sorry."

At the same moment, he apologizes too and they gaze at each other in confusion before the tension eases slightly and she smiles, his grin following hers. "I didn't mean to make you cry," he says awkwardly, carefully brushing at her cheeks with a tenderness that touches her deep inside.

She cups his hands with hers, still pressed against her face, and shakes her head. "I should've asked-- are you ok?" Her eyes drift down to his shirt, which is hiding the evidence of everything he went through because of her, until he squeezes her hands, regaining her attention.

"I really, really am. I promise." As she sighs in relief, his soft grin turns a little cheeky. "I'll be better once you get rid of that lamp though."

She laughs and nods, finding it no huge sacrifice in comparison to everything he's lost. "Consider it done."


	4. Turn of Events

"Look it," he tells Alice a few days after he first appeared on earth, waving a newspaper at her. She looks up from the notebook she's scribbling in and sees just below his finger an article that causes her to groan. "What, I think it's flattering." His grin is quick and dangerous as she gives up on her notebook and joins him, leaning over to read.

"Local construction worker is a hero," she reads incredulously, not responding as his hands curl around her middle, pulling her closer to his side. "But that was just a cover you used on my mother to explain how you found me so quickly... How is that rumor spreading?"

He looks a little impish and guilty all at once, which somehow makes him look even cuter, but she holds her ground, purses her lips at him unhappily until he breaks, raising his arms up in an oh-so innocent shrug. "The construction company that's working on that building the Looking Glass was in contacted me," he says quickly. "They need some good publicity or what have you, so this gentleman who's very willing to please contacted me with an offer."

Her jaw drops a little. "You... seriously?" How these things happen to Hatter, she's never sure. "What kind of offer?"

He just smiles up at her, the naughty glint in his eyes exasperating her at the same time it arouses her. She sighs as he brushes his lips down her wrist before tugging her into his lap. "I'm not going to forget this conversation," she warns him but sighs, melting slightly as his kisses trail to her throat, humming "Mm hmm" against her skin.


	5. Stargazing

It's been a long day, very long. Around January, many more people enter her class-- probably a side effect of people buying classes as gifts for people interested in self-defense for whatever reason. Teaching new people how to get the basics down is tiresome and a little boring, however rewarding it is to watch as they get better thanks to _her_. Right now, she's cold and tired and just wants to settle in in front of the TV with Hatter and drink some hot chocolate, watch some mindless TV and doze off before the grind begins again tomorrow.

She's so busy dwelling on this that she almost doesn't notice the form stretched out on the sidewalk outside of the apartment until she almost steps on him, yelping at the last moment and skittering away. "Hatter!" she reprimands once she's sure that she hadn't stepped on him. "What are you doing? It's freezing outside!"

He peeks up at her with an impish grin on his face and shrugs. "You've never taken the time just to sit out and look up at the stars?"

Her jaw drops. "In 20 degree temperatures?! No I can't say I have! Are you trying to make yourself sick?"

He looks thoughtful for a moment and then stands up to join her. "Why don't you warm me up then?"

She shies away, shaking her head. "Sorry, but no way, not out here. Get inside!" she tells the shivering, still grinning man. He pouts at her a bit but follows her inside anyway, shrugging off his snow-drenched coat at the doorway and kicking his boots off, well versed in how unhappy she gets when he tracks snow through the apartment. "How long were you _out _there?" she demands, bringing a towel out and running it through his soaked hair repeatedly, leaving it looking even crazier than it did in Wonderland when she first met him. She has to admit he looks cute as he shakes his head, ears probably stinging from her brisk rubbing. She'd never admit it though, and risk encouraging behavior such as this.

"Fifteen minutes, maybe?" he asks thoughtlessly, moving towards the vent that's filling the apartment with hot air and extending his hands over it like it's a fireplace.

She rolls her eyes, pushing him towards the bathroom. "Take a shower, but keep the water only a little warm... then turn it up slowly, don't want to shock your system." He grins at her but she cuts him off immediately. "No, I'm not joining you." A hot shower sounds nice but they'd probably get distracted so... Best to go solo this time. He looks downtrodden but heads to the room anyway as she goes the other way, finding a change of clothes for him to be ready once he gets out, to keep the chill completely at bay.

Once she has the clothes prepared, she settles in at the door of the bathroom and just listens as the water runs, shaking her head at him. He's definitely the most infuriating boyfriend she's ever had but she still loves him, all of his quirks just making things interesting. It's only stuff like what he did tonight that worries her, the general impulsiveness of it all that could seriously harm him one day that makes her breath seize in her throat, makes it hard to consider what she'd do if he ever did hurt himself or worse.

Things in Wonderland and earth are distinctly different-- what could kill in Wonderland are vague nightmares here, and most afflictions in earth are unheard of over there and she's taken great pains in explaining to him the general things to look out for-- cars being at the forefront of that list. Now she supposes she has to add hypothermia to that list.

After a minute the water stops and she perks to attention, listening as sounds of him moving around in the room next to her echoes in the quietness now filling the apartment.

When he speaks, she jerks. "Stars are different in Wonderland," he calls out to her, voice muffled through the door.

"Oh?"

"Yes. They're only visible in a couple places... The hardest places in Wonderland to reach..." His voice fades away quietly.

She frowns, suddenly understanding a little better his actions from earlier with this simple statement.

_Jellybean, look at the stars, aren't they pretty? _she remembers her father whisper to her late one evening as she forgoes sleep to stare up at the night sky, perched on her father's shoulder. The stars would become something she takes for granted more the older she gets.

Her throat closes up a little at the memory and the thought of Hatter never having something like that as a kid to remember. She shakes it off as the bathroom door opens a little, and she stuffs the clothes into Hatter's arms as he raises his eyebrows at her. "Put those on to stay warm." She smiles tiredly at him as he shuffles the clothes and reenters the room. As he rustles around behind her, she leans against the doorway and sighs. "Spring's only a couple months away," she says thoughtfully. "We can stare at the stars all you want then."

When he comes out fully dressed a minute later, he doesn't say anything but kisses her intensely, the appreciation in his expressive eyes overwhelming her.


	6. Relief

It's mid-January and things are going startling well-- Hatter's been a part of her world for just around a month, making his own mark on New York. He works part time at a tea shop when he's not spending time with Alice or checking in on Wonderland-- short visits where he helps the refugees settle back in to their lives, or spend some time with the tea-addicted as they rehab. She never asks but can tell that he feels it his responsibility to make sure everyone's ok, since he was one of the main tea sellers of Wonderland, and it makes her fall more and more for him every day, the relief that she feels whenever he returns safely overwhelming.

A part of her still expects things to go to hell like it always has with her past relationships but Hatter's not like the others and things carry on, he stays and she stays and things just feel right, even when they argue.

One day, she dozes off during a movie marathon they were having in his apartment and wakes up to find him not next to her, watching her sleep, or tinkering in the kitchen. He's no where to be found and she frowns, sitting up. "Hatter? Hatter!"

He's a heavy sleeper so she tries to convince herself that he went to bed, that he's not left without saying goodbye, but old fears return to her as she stumbles off of the couch and looks around the small place he had claimed as his own within a week of moving here. She relaxes a bit when she notes that his hat is still resting on the couch over her shoulder. She plucks it up and goes to look for him. _Tadah,_ she thinks, pushing his bedroom door open. "Hatter?"

The room's dark, quiet, but she can hear him breathing steadily. "Hatter? Are you awake?" Her confusion grows as she flicks the light on and finds the bed empty. "Um. Hatter?"

"Down here," he finally says from the other side of the bed, sounding sheepish and a little breathless.

"Are you ok?" she asks, worry mixing with the confusion as she leans over the bed and finds him laying on the floor, hands crossed over his chest as he looks up at her, grinning anxiously. "What are you doing down there?"

"Um," he coughs awkwardly, sitting up. "Well, y'see, I heard from someone in the tea shop that laying on a hard, flat surface could help one's back... so, here I am."

"What's wrong with your back?" she demands, eyes widening as he joins her on the bed. His hands ghost over her back and she shudders at the touch, shaking her head. "Nuh uh, you're not distracting me," she insists, sitting up and moving away from his fingers. "What's going on?"

He seems to be weighing what to tell but finally sighs, slumping forward. "Well, I figured the aches would fade away, but they've not..."

She pieces the puzzle together correctly within seconds, remembering how the pain flooded his eyes as suits pinned him to the ground and shakes her head, fingers rushing to her lips. "Oh, God, Hatter, is it from when those suits slammed you off of the horse?" she whispers in horror.

He examines his fingers thoughtfully, nodding. "Yeah. I mean, it's not horrible pain but sometimes..." He drifts off, kicking himself for saying _that_ much, not wanting to make it worse for the girl next to him.

She turns to him and he's horrified to see tears pricking at her eyes. "I'm so sorry..."

"Oh, don't cry!" he says, cupping her face. "Please, Alice. It's not a big deal."

She ignores him, reaching up with a hand to clasp his. "Lay down on the bed, on your stomach," she requests quietly.

He frowns and says, "Alrigh'..." When she moves aside, he stretches out and sighs, his eyes closing on their own.

"Where's it hurt?" she whispers, pressing her hand on his shoulder blades carefully, not wanting to make him feel worse.

"Lower," he mutters, melting into the pillow as her soft touch goes lower, finally hitting the right spot, midway down his spine. She wonders how many other aches and pains he hides from her-- the thought makes her sad and she loses track of what she's doing for a minute. He hisses and she stops, apologies tangling along her vocal cords. "It's ok, continue," he encourages her, easing back into the pillow as she resumes massaging.

"Is this helping at all?" she whispers after a few minutes, not wanting to wake him up if he's asleep.

"Yeah," he breathes groggily, voice distorted by the pillow. "A lot, actually."

She smiles. "Hatter?"

"Yuh-huh?"

"Next time you hurt or have a problem, tell me... please?" Her voice is tentative, so young sounding that it makes a part of him ache.

"Of course," he breathes.


	7. Torture

"I am bored," a voice says.

"As am I. What to do, what to do," a similar voice responds, as if in a distorted echo. "Perhaps we should find..._ him_."

"What a marvelous prospect. We shall do just that."

---------

_God, that was so stupid,_ she thinks as she storms down a sidestreet, sucking in air like it's going out of style and releasing it in angry puffs. She's too agitated to think clearly, so she's excused herself to get some air and she thinks he's probably somewhere nearby, because he never could let her leave, old protective habits from Wonderland never fading. No matter how long they've both been on earth. In fact if she focuses hard enough she can hear soft footsteps a way behind her and, no matter how angry she is, it does make her feel a little more secure-- especially that despite how annoyed he might be with her-- or hurt-- he still cares enough to follow.

She's about to turn around and locate him when she hears a strange thud somewhere nearby and freezes, her eyes widening. "Hatter?" Her fingers clench a little when nothing happens and mostly forgotten paranoia from her time in Wonderland flares to life, every little sound magnifying. "Hatter?" she whispers once more, not wanting to be found in case it's someone dangerous. There's a loud, scraping sound and she turns in a circle as the sound echoes, seemingly coming from nowhere and everywhere all at once, her worry skyrocketing.

Finally her fear eases a little and she runs forward, trying to pinpoint where the sounds might've come from. The street and alleys surrounding it are empty. She looks around in confusion and shakes her head.

It's only then that she realizes the footsteps have disappeared too.

------------

"You were such a fighter," a voice says quietly as glass clinks together, an annoying melody to the man tied up to the chair.

"No matter what we used on you, you wouldn't break. How do you think you'd handle this?" the second pipes up as the clinking noise finally stops.

Hatter glares up, his dark eyes gleaming in the dull sunlight filtering through the tree tops as Drs. Dee and Dum prance around him, vials of that horrible tea in their hands held at the ready. What exactly they're planning, he's not looking forward to finding out.

How exactly they got the tea now that the casino's destroyed, he doesn't even know. When he left for Alice's world, he hadn't exactly looked back, which he's now paying for as he doesn't know what's going on.

Hatter fights to keep the anxiety from his face but, oh yes, it's there as he eyes the vials. He's well versed in tea, knows how each one tastes, how different emotions can interact with others, what overdoses can do to a person. He swallows, closing his eyes against memories of Wonderlanders being carted out of his tea shop due to bad reactions.

One of the two Tweedles-- how Alice came to calling them that, he's not sure, but it seems to fit somehow-- approach him, a sadistic look on his face. "Open wide, open wide," he chants but Hatter resists, looking away.

"He seems to be making this difficult," the second says with a sneer before joining his brother. "What say you, shall we truly enjoy this?"

"I say yes," Dee says with a demented smirk. Hatter's eyes widen as they pull out a large syringe, which he's only had the honor of seeing once when Alice insisted he get a tetanus shot after a nail embedded itself in his shoe. However, the one he saw on earth was about tenth the size of this thing. He swallows.

---------------

Alice ignores the dread in her gut as she returns to their apartment and unlocks it, unsurprised to find it's empty. She tries to forget how alone she felt in the alleyway before she gave up and returned here. Forces herself to not dwell on the look on Hatter's face as she spat at him that she needed some air before storming from the apartment. Focuses on the apartment, searching each and every room for him.

A cup of tea is on the kitchen counter, long cold from when it was abandoned during their _discussion_, his leather jacket-- one of the few things he brought with him from Wonderland, unable to part with it and his well-worn hat-- hanging from the coat rack behind her. She swallows, trying not to think about him out there this chilly evening without it, following her and... and...

"Oh God, I need help," she finally admits out loud, scrubbing at her itchy cheeks. She's surprised to find tears staining her skin.

---------

He used to be good at avoiding trouble, he thinks. He worked both sides against the other, selling the Queen's tea while feeding the refugees, and doing so he survived for ages-- which was only ever that, it wasn't _living_, he knows this now.

Then he met Alice and trouble dogged him but the adventure was worth it, the stress of his years-long tightrope dance suddenly off of his shoulders as she inspired him to make a choice and stick with it. He never thought he'd see it happen but the queen was overthrown, peace took over Wonderland with Jack being made king-- or so he thought-- and Hatter was free to do what he wanted, which was strange after being caught between the two sides for so long, pushed by Dodo and the Queen evenly. After years of being ordered about, it was bizarre to be in a world where no one wanted anything from him-- his tea shop was decimated, the refugees were free and all he could think about was Alice. So of course, he went to her.

Then this happened. This... this... his head is spinning and he's feeling pretty dizzy, his thoughts impossible to focus. He glances down impassively as one of the so-called doctors ooh and ahh as the needle pierces his skin, drains more of the emotion tea into his blood stream. They're acting like it's the best floor show they've had in awhile as a giddy sensation passes through his already muddled thought processes, making him feel even sicker. Two doctors turn into six before his very eyes and he flinches, causing the binds to dig even deeper into his skin. He doesn't react.

_Alice... what..._

_--------_

The trip back to the looking glass is a little horrifying but she's not sure what else to do, where else to go. Hatter's missing, she can feel it deep inside that something's wrong and there's a chance it has something to do with Wonderland.

Hatter's told her that Jack's decided to leave the portal between the two worlds open for a short period of time each day-- which makes the time it opens varied because of the time difference being so fluid between the two worlds... of course, Wonderland would never make sense. She's nearly there when she notices something odd-- there's activity in the building that's been abandoned for months-- something the queen had set up, to hold the looking glass safely so she could get as many oysters as she wanted.

Alice takes a deep breath and watches from around the corner as familiarly dressed men march from the building and she groans. "Oh no." It's basically proof of her fear-- something's going on in Wonderland. Suits are marching single file from the building and she thinks this could easily be a suicidal move but her worry about Hatter is keeping her from caring as she walks out in front of them, cutting them off. "Excuse me!"

The first two gaze at her coldly before one raises his hand in a silent command to the men behind him to stop. Alice holds her breath as he gazes upon her a bit longer. "You are Alice Hamilton."

"Ye-yes," she says uncomfortably, hand instinctively going to the arm where the glow used to reside, even though it's been gone for months now. "Is there something going on with Wonderland? My boyfriend-- Hatter-- he's missing and I'm worried..." The fact that she doesn't even stumble over calling Hatter such barely registers with her.

"There are reports that former henchmen of the queen's have gotten through the Looking Glass," the second suit says as if he's discussing what he's going to have for supper. The lack of interest in his tone or gaze grates at Alice but she can't do much about it. "We are researching these claims. You say a former Wonderlander has been taken?"

"Yes," she says fretfully, her chest aching at the carelessness to his tone despite the words that could very well bring her world crashing down. If she thought the guilt and desperation was bad when Jack had been taken before her eyes, it was nothing compared to this... Speaking of whom... "M-may I talk to your King about this? Jack Heart?"

The first suit jerks his head at the man next to him before turning to her. "I will accompany you through the looking glass." As she gapes at him, the others begin marching again, determined to finish their search. "Go."

She swallows and turns to look at the glass almost hesitantly before remembering _Hatter_ and the lengths he'd go for her before plunging into the fluid depths. The trip is no less intense and she hits hard on the cement, dazed a moment before a red-endorned hand drops into her view. She swallows and grips it, allowing herself to be pulled up. She looks up and almost droops in relief. "Jack!" Duchess is behind him, a grimace on her lips as Alice releases Jack's hand and shakes her head, having no time or patience for exes or their drama. "I need your help. Hatter's missing, I think."

Jack hmms a moment before staring intensely at her, something about his gaze unnerving her, not for the first time. "I should have contacted you both before now-- my mother's most vicious followers were never found after the Casino's destruction. Doctors Dee and Dum... one of the scientists says he believes they were who made it into the other world."

Alice's jaw drops as she remembers clearly the damage they've done to Hatter already and she's clutching at Jack's sleeve as if glued to the fabric. "_They _took Hatter?! No! We have to find him, Jack!"

Jack nods. "And we will, Alice. We will. I already have a group of suits in the other world, searching. Now that we know who they've probably taken, we'll have a better chance of finding them. Hatter is strong and resourceful, Alice. Don't think the worst just yet."

She nods distractedly, trying to think. "Do you think they have him on earth or did they bring him back here?" she wonders helplessly, her fists clenching at her sides as she thinks about what she'd like to do to the freaky looking men. It'd make Hatter's sledgehammer look like nothing...

"Either is possible," the king says, a glimmer of regret in his eyes as she tugs at her lips with a finger, a nervous habit of hers. "You see, even though there's only one looking glass on this side, the scientists can make people appear from the other side anywhere they want-- which is why when you followed us in, we all appeared near to the White Rabbit headquarters, instead of here. You understand?"

She nods uncomfortably, dwelling on this. "And on earth?"

"It's not quite as simple over there. Any mirror can be used for the same reason, but we have to be careful where we end up so only those we want to can see us. Thus we usually only use the looking glass in the abandoned warehouse."

It makes sense, she supposes. Would really hinder a mysterious mission if they suddenly found themselves in someone's bedroom. Not that that would stop the Tweedles, to be honest... She feels sick at the thought.

"This scientist--" she says, remembering something. "Is he the one who set the mirror up for the Tweedles?"

"Unfortunately," Jack nods. "He doesn't remember much, however. They appear to have had... some teas on them. They used Forgetfulness on him."

Alice stares almost uncomprehendingly. "Wait, how did they get the teas? I thought they were all destroyed."

"Many places around Wonderland had tea, Alice. It was an arduous task to destroy it all. It's possible before they went into hiding, they may have found it from a place we hadn't been yet."

She groans. "This just keeps getting worse and worse."

----------

Hatter's vision is really swimming now, not even capable of focusing on anything... all he sees is colors and shapes blurring before him as he vaguely registers the dull pain of the needle entering his arm a time or two more. _So much tea,_ he thinks disjointedly. _Drowning... not good... I..._ He loses his tenuous grip on reality, fading away into the darkness.

The last thing he hears is faint, maniacal laughter.

----------

The search begins immediately and Alice reluctantly stays at the Looking Glass chamber for awhile, uncomfortably aware of the watchful eyes of Suits on her. Jack doesn't want her to slow the suits down, which rankles at her because, if not for her, he wouldn't be King right now.

"Alice!" a familiar voice greets her suddenly and she jerks, turning to find Charlie standing behind her with a pleased smile.

"Charlie!" she gasps, dashing to his side and hugging him. "It's so good to see you."

He lifts her hand to his face, kissing her palm regally. "I have heard of what happened to the harbringer..." His eyes examine her face thoughtfully. "How are you, dear Alice?"

She swallows and shakes her head. "I'll be better when we find him."

"Of course," he murmurs. "Perhaps the world beyond will be able to aid..." She watches in near-amusement as he drops stiffly to his knees, words rushing from his lips rapidly, half of which she can't even catch as he calls upon... whatever.

_Some things never change,_ she thinks fondly, but doesn't say anything. Despite Hatter's reluctance at believing in the old man's _abilities_, it had somehow helped a time or two-- like getting her out of the truth room-- so she was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

She's about to look away from the still babbling man when his eyes snap open and he sucks in a deep breath of air like he's just seen something horrible. "Oh," he keens.

Her anxiety rises, Charlie never looking or sounding like that in all the time she's known him. "What?!"

He seems to snap back to awareness at her exclamation and he lurches to his feet, trying to look normal and failing drastically. "Oh, the other side has no answer for me," he says, the fake chipper tones grating at her patience. "So unusual that it would fail me now, it's usually so--"

"Charlie."

"Yes, milady?"

"What did you see?" The sudden crestfallen look on his face causes her to take a step back. "No, Charlie. No."

"I am so sorry, Alice. Harbringer is..."

"I said no!" she interrupts shakily. Charlie looks down unhappily as Alice's refusals echo in the hall.

----------

Hatter's body twitches as the teas circulate through his system. Dee and Dum cackle as they circle him, refilling the needle as they go.

_"Alice,_" _he whispers, running his finger down her face as she dozes, nose pressed into his throat. "I'll never leave you."_

Another needle jab, more, more liquid, burning its way into his system, making things even more muddled.

_Her body stiffens and his hand stills as she sits up, looking unhappy, almost angry._

His body seizes in the chair, more pain following as the binds dig into his skin all the more, drawing blood from already raw wrists and ankles.

_"Don't say that, not after everything," she says, glowering at the couch they were sprawled peacefully on just minutes before. "No one can promise that."_

Breathing is hard, his senses muddling almost as fast as his mind. His hearing is fading, his vision is gone and he can barely feel the needles as they prick into him, the amount of teas entering him immediately passing his notice.

_"But, Alice,"_ _he says, wounded by her attitude towards his honest statement. "I--"_

His fingers twitch once, twice, and three times as he comes down from the seizure, focus drifting like snow on a mountain.

_"I need some air," she snaps, leaving just like that. He thinks it's a joke at first but when two minutes have passed and she's not returned, he follows, pain in his chest growing with each passing second._

The last thing he feels is pain exploding through his body before unconsciousness finally claims him completely.

---------

Alice refuses to look at Charlie as she reflects on the last time she saw Hatter, how she had let her fears and insecurities take her over _again_ and oh God, what if she was right? What if he couldn't promise that, but... but, if she hadn't left, he wouldn't have been in range for Dee and Dum to take so easily... She curls her hands into a fist and slams it against her thighs, tears tracking down her face. _All my fault, all my fault,_ she breathes.

"Don't hurt yourself," Charlie implores her, appearing from behind and clutching her fist with a gentle but strong grip. "Harbringer wouldn't have wanted this for you."

"His name's Hatter," she chokes out, remembering the disbelieving annoyance in his voice when Charlie first called him Vassal.

"Very well," Charlie says, his eyes shining with sadness. "_Hatter _wouldn't have wanted this for you, either."

"I need to find him," she chokes, officially done doing what Jack wants of her. "Will you help me look?"

"Certainly," the White Knight's former page agrees readily, standing at attention as if he's been waiting for further action since the queen fell.

She swallows and hugs him tightly once more. "I'm sorry I snapped," she breathes, wishing she could tell it to the man who _really_ deserves to hear it right now. He squeezes her back for a moment before she pulls away and forces a smile. "Ready?"

"Always, Lady Alice!" he nods sturdily.

---------

"Tsk, tsk, he has lost consciousness," Dee says, leaning over to look and using a thick finger to prod his eyelid open. "What shall we do, now, brother?"

Dum thinks for a moment before suggesting, "Shall we go back to usual torture, see if he regains consciousness?"

"I do not see the humor in that, if he mayn't scream..."

"True enough. However, he might scream despite his unconsciousness. You never know."

Dee nods, thinking. "You have a point." His face eases into a creepy smile and he pulls out a rod. "My old friend..."

Both doctors cackle viciously.

--------

Alice and Charlie sneak out of the chamber, an eye out for anyone looking willing to stop them. "Is Genevieve still around?" she whispers.

"But of course!" he hisses back, before whistling. The old, faithful horse is by their side within minutes, whinnying at Alice.

She smiles and pats the horse before looking at Charlie. "Where's your second horse at?"

"Regretfully I had to choose one or the other," he says slowly. "She liked to be free, the royal stables needn't have been a good place for her. Thus the correct choice was dear Genevieve here." He smiles.

Alice nods. "So, we'll ride together."

"Very well, Lady Alice!" he says. "Shall I help you on first?"

She pauses, remembering riding behind Hatter what felt like years ago now, her eyes gleaming with pain and desperation to find him. "No, I'm ok." She waits until he mounts, then gains her footing and holds onto him until she's settled safely behind him. The ride makes her miss Hatter all the more-- Charlie's armor working against her as she clings to him and she misses the feel of leather and soft silk-- but she pushes it out of her mind, reminding herself why-- who for-- she's here as they make their way to the beach and into the forest that she never thought she'd see again.

"Charlie?" she asks after awhile, realizing that the knight has headed this way as if he knows exactly where they need to go.

"Yes?" he asks quietly, and she regrets breaking his focus, especially if he's getting his ideas from the "other side".

"Why are we heading this way?" she asks finally, not completely certain she wants to know the answer. She's still worried about what he's foreseen.

"I am being led here," he admits. "Har-- Hatter is amongst leaves and trees, forest creatures... We must not tarry."

"He's-- he's bad, isn't he?" she chokes out, unable to say anything else about his condition.

Charlie doesn't answer but grips one of her hands with his, squeezing gently. She swallows as tears drip down her face at this silent admission.

---------

Hatter is spinning in a swirling circle of pain and darkness, unable to focus on anything. He hears fragments of voices, feels familiar pain shocking up his rib cage and he wonders if he ever really did kill Mad March, if escape from the torture room was a bad dream... if his life with Alice after freeing the resistance was all a delusion caused by repeated beatings and the tea forced on him.

His memory is so spotty, he's uncertain. It doesn't really seem to matter anymore anyway... He sighs and closes his eyes, clenching his fist. Something keeps him from giving up completely, even though he can't really remember what. _I have to prove her wrong..._ He frowns at this unbidden thought, unable to tell who or what caused it.

------------

Dee cackles as Dum nearly stabs Hatter through with the prod, the man's whole tea-inebriated body flailing against the straps holding him tightly to the chair with each electric charge sent through his body. He doesn't scream but froth is coming from his mouth and it's nearly an acceptable compromise.

"Who knew, who knew, screaming isn't needed," Dum chants as he skips around Hatter, gleefully pressing the prod into any part of him he chooses to.

They're so busy with their fun they don't hear the clomp of horse hooves until it's too late-- those same hooves send them scattering as Genevieve nickers and drops to all fours, just inches from Hatter, Alice thanking God that Charlie has such good control over the loyal steed. Her thoughts return to her boyfriend and his capturers as she disembarks from the horse, quickly going after Dee and Dum.

"It's the oyster!" one says mockingly, sneering at her. "Back to save your love, are we?" She wonders if their ability to read minds are not just a truthroom thing but she can't consider this, desperate to check on Hatter.

"I wonder if the girl still has such a crippling fear of heights," the other says, peering inquisitively at her.

"What say you we take her to the edge of the business central and see what happens?" his brother responds, sneer growing.

Tired of their insistent babblings, Alice drops into a stance, hands held out defensively.

"What is this, brother? Does the oyster think she can _fight _us?" Both doctors cackle maddeningly. "She thinks we would degrade ourselves by such an oyster way of handling things!"

Before she can say or do anything, the brothers disappear in a poof. "DAMMIT!" she gasps, angry at herself for letting them get away so easily.

"Lady!" Charlie calls out from behind her, his voice shaking with desperation.

Her heart stutters as she remembers why she's really here. "HATTER!" she cries, turning and running to the chair he was tied to. Charlie's freed him since, thankfully, but the former tea shop owner isn't responsive, flopping forward against Charlie as the older man shakes him, trying to revive him. Tears well in her eyes as she takes in his clammy skin, the needle pricks up and down both of his twitching arms... Afraid of what she'd find, she reluctantly pulls up his bright shirt and almost gags upon finding fresh burns scattered upon his rib cage, mixed in with bruises and cuts.

_If I ever find Dee and Dum, I swear... I'll kill them,_ she thinks darkly, running a hand gently over Hatter's face, horrified by the heat she finds there. _Oh God. I'm so sorry._

----------

"They overdosed him on tea," Jack explains to her what his scientists and doctors have found, peering down at her with a worried glint in his eyes.

She nods, struggling to hold herself together. "When will he wake up?"

He falters and runs his hands through his impeccable blonde hair, messing it up. It's so unlike Jack to be like this that she knows she's going to hate what he's about to say. "He... may never wake up again, Alice. I'm sorry."

She shakes her head. "No. No, no no! He... he will, he will. Why wouldn't he? Don't tell me that, Jack. Don't you _dare_ tell me that!"

Jack looks truly regretful as he explains quietly. "Oyster emotions effect us _so strongly,_ Alice. During the time I spent on your world, I researched some of the drugs over there-- the side effects overdoses can cause, things of that nature. It really isn't that different from here... My doctors have explained to me that Hatter is catatonic," he says quietly. "If he awakens... he will more than likely never be the same again."

Alice ignores the tears forming in her eyes-- will she ever stop crying again?-- and gasps as she slaps him, surprising herself as much as he. "Don't you ever say that again," she says shakily. "He'll wake up, and he'll be himself, and things will be fine. Don't ever talk to me about Hatter again. You don't know him." She's shaking as she heads to Hatter's side, taking his cold hand in hers and kissing his knuckles.

His eyes are open and he's gazing off distantly into nothing. He doesn't respond to her touch and a fresh wave of tears runs down her cheeks.

-------

Days pass, the burns slowly heal as much as they ever will, leaving small scars along his stomach and back, the worse being one she hadn't noticed initially at the nape of his neck, barely hidden by the collar of Wonderland's version of a hospital gown. His fever fades but the twitches remain, reminding her of all he's been through. "Are you in pain?" she murmurs to him, clinging to his hand as a nurse carefully changes his bandages. She hadn't left his side for more than a few moments since that one conversation with Jack.

"Lady Alice?" Charlie asks softly, startling her.

She's not even heard him enter but she can't bring herself to care about her lack of observation skills. Her eyes are gritty, her skin feels grimy and she feels stretched too thin as she examines Hatter, takes in his every breath, prays that eventually he'll catch her eye or something- anything. "Yeah, Charlie?" she murmurs after a moment.

"King Jack thinks you should get some sleep," he says hesitantly, not wanting to anger the worn out girl.

Alice shakes her head. "I'm fine, Charlie. I'll sleep later."

"This is not healthy, Lady," the knight is starting to say, when she cuts in.

"_This_ is not healthy," she breathes, waving a hand at Hatter's pale, gaunt form. He's never been so quiet or still, it scares her more than anything else. She listens as Charlie leaves reluctantly but knows that the man is right-- Hatter needs her and it would do him no good if she has a breakdown or faints from lack of food or sleep.

She sighs and carefully crawls onto the bed he's been laid out on, pressing her face into his throat, tentative. She doesn't want to hurt him further or pull the cords connected to his body but she needs to be near, just in case something changes. "I'm here," she murmurs as tears drip down her face, remembering the last time she was in this position with Hatter. It feels like years ago, not the mere days it has been. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have said those things to you. This is all my fault."

He doesn't move or respond and, though she's not surprised, it cracks her already broken heart all the more. Everything in her is telling her to leave but she remains, lulled by the sound of his breathing, the beat of his heart underneath her palm splayed out across his skin. "Stay with me," she whispers, kissing the stubbly skin her lips are touching delicately. "Please..."

She dozes off reluctantly, pulled under by the soft rocking of his every breath.

-----

What feels like only minutes later, she wakes up slowly, hand curling around Hatter's sleeve. She feels like crap and wonders what kind of drink Hatter found for them to try out last night, but when she shifts against him and yawns, her hand stumbles across an IV line and she stops immediately, memories flooding back to her in wave after wave of horror. "Oh God," she breathes, sitting up carefully and staring at him. "No..." Her hand rests on his cheek and she stifles a sob. "I forgot. How did I forget?"

"Lady Alice?"

She jerks and looks over, relaxing as she discovers it's only Charlie watching them with a sad twinkle in his eyes. "Charlie," she greets him, suddenly feeling ashamed. "Um, I'm sorry--"

"No apologies, milady," he says, knowing immediately what she's apologizing for. She smiles fondly at him, uncertain what she'd do without the kind old man. "It is a difficult time. If you wish to eat, I've brought something for you." She now smells a familiar scent on the air and blinks-- "Fresh borogrove," he confirms with a grin as she smiles for the first time in what feels like forever. He's very accommodating, bringing a plate of the meat to her so she doesn't need to move from Hatter's side but can also eat.

She feels even more horrible for how she treated him yesterday and catches his arm, stopping him before he can move away. "Thank you, Charlie, for everything."

He seems to understands and nods, "Anytime, Lady Alice." He leaves quietly and she rests against Hatter as she picks at the food.

"We have some good friends," she comments inanely to him, brushing her fingers against his cheek. A few hours pass quietly as she talks about anything and everything, not daring to run out of words. She's not sure if he can hear her but she remembers stories from earth of people who could hear their loved ones even in comas. Even if catatonia isn't exactly the same as a coma, it's enough for her to keep trying.

A little later, a couple nurses enter and move Hatter, sit him in a chair brought in just for this purpose. They explain to Alice that Hatter needs moved every now and again, for exercise and to keep him from getting bedsores. She nods distantly, trying to wrap her mind around the fact that his life could resemble-- this-- forever more and a fresh batch of bitter tears run down her cheek as she leans over him, her head telling her _run, run, he wouldn't want you to see him like this, and what good does it do if you stay? He can't hear you anyway._

Her heart, however, is stronger. _You've already ran from him enough, Alice,_ it chides her, outtalking her brain just enough. _Don't hurt him further by leaving when he _really_ needs you. _She listens to her heart and cups his face, gently pressing kisses along his jawline. "I'm tired of Wonderland taking things from me," she says softly, her breath drifting across his skin and blowing his hair around, as she gazes deeply into his unresponsive eyes. "It can't have you too."

She finds that even though it's not yet night time, it's becoming more and more of a chore to keep her eyes open so she settles on the floor next to his chair and rests her face on his lap, curling her fingers around his. "I'll be right here," she murmurs sleepily, her eyes drifting closed.

----------

She's only out what feels like a minute when she opens her eyes and finds herself in a disgustingly familiar room-- red and white decorating every square inch of it. She surges up, looking around. _This isn't right,_ she thinks desperately, turning in a circle. "This place was destroyed," she mutters. "I watched it crumble..."

She stares around at the queen's throne room, nausea swirling in her gut. "Why am I back here? Where..." She shakes her head, utterly confused. "Hatter, I was just with Hatter!" Everything comes crashing back to her-- how he had been drugged, abused again by Dee and Dum. Her face crumbles. "Oh God. I... I left him again? I didn't mean to!" she mumbles, already frayed emotions leaving her desperate and uncertain what to do next. "I need out of here."

Before she can take a step towards the large doors across the hall from her, she hears a strange sound behind her and turns slowly. A familar ball-like device sits and she glares at it, remembering how it felt to be held inside as her father refused her and the queen sentenced her to banishment, Jack to death, and she thought she had lost everything, since she figured Hatter had been already put to death. Something draws her towards the torturous thing and she peers inside, jaw dropping.

Hatter's inside, staring out at her, his brown eyes expressive and somewhere between relieved and fearful as they lock with hers.

She shakes her head, "This has to be a trick, or a dream, or something," she mutters, resting her hand on the side of the compartment. To her surprise, he rests his hand on top of where hers is and shakes his head. "It-- it's not?"

He mouths something and she groans, resting her head against the barricade blocking them from each other. "Oh my God. Are you ok?" He looks frustrated as he shrugs and she takes in how tired and bruised he looks. "God," she sighs. "How do I get you out of here? Your fist--"

He raises it and she pales, taking in the swollen, bloody skin around his knuckles. "Ok, that's a no go," she mutters. "Dammit, what can I do..." Unsure what else to do, she brushes her fingers across the surface of the ball, looking for an opening or hidden switch, something-- anything. The queen had liked her little secret openings-- the box the stone of Wonderland residing in proof of that-- but there was nothing obvious that Alice could see... _Knowing my luck, it's programmed to only listen to her,_ she thinks despondently, returning to where she can see Hatter. It's not neccessarily the time or the place but it bubbles from her, as she stares in at him and he looks back at her, trust and love for her overwhelming the frustation in his gaze. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left like that, I told you I trust you completely... I just forget sometimes, everything you've done for me, as stupid as it sounds. Please, would you ever forgive me?"

He gapes at her in surprise, as if what she had done, what had put him in this situation, had been forgotten already. His lips soften into a smile as they stare at each other, nodding to show that her apology's been accepted.

She smiles back tearily, her fingers pressing against the curve of the circular device and his rest above where her hand's at but before she can say or do anything else, the thing begins to shift between them, shattering like little pieces of glass that just couldn't be held up any longer. Her jaw drops as he's slowly freed, his eyes widening in just as much surprise. "Oh, my God." He steps out of the ball and she gapes at him, reaching out to touch him. Before she can even graze his arm with her fingertips, everything fades away slowly.

----------

She wakes up just as slowly, not daring to move. Her face is still pressed into his lap, her fingers curled around his. This is reality. _That_ was nothing more than a taunting dream. Her heart breaks anew as another wave of tears stream down her cheeks, her whole body shaking with the agony that this falseness has caused her. She doesn't register the tickling feel of a hand rubbing between her shoulder blades down her back. She doesn't even hear the voice at first. She does feel the soft kisses along her cheek though, the soft breaths blowing against her skin.

Everything comes into focus, reality superimposes itself before returning to normal-- she listens in confusion as a familiar voice whispers her name, a touch ghosts up her back, and lips press against her cheek, her temple, the side of her nose. "Alice."

She jerks upright, gazing into the beautifully conscious eyes that are gazing down at her with no limit of worry in their depths. "Hatter?" she whispers, as if afraid her voice could shatter him-- return him to his unresponsive self.

"I believe so," he says with a gentle smile, grunting as she hugs him tightly, almost tipping the chair backwards with the force of it. "I'm here," he whispers into her hair, tangling his still trembling fingers in the long locks. "It's ok."

"I'm sorry," she murmurs again, crying again-- tears of happiness this time, finally.

He nods, then shakes his head, "I heard you in the dream, or whatever that was-- you don't need to apologize--"

"Yes, yes I do," she says, pulling away once more and leaving them both feeling cold. "I shouldn't have left like I did, I shouldn't--"

He cuts her off with a finger to her lips, smiling tenderly at her. "It's ok, luv. We'll work on it, huh? We have plenty of time."

She wipes at her eyes plaintively, ghosts her fingers across his still bandaged chest as she stares up at him. "You promise?"

His eyes darken and he nods. "I promise."


End file.
